I Love You, Momma.

Postive Affirmations for Momma

Generosity of Strangers

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John and I were unexpectedly blessed last night by a complete stranger. To be completely honest, I still don’t even know what the woman looks like or her name, not even what her voice sounds like. I need to share this story, because it is such a huge boost to my faith, a boost I needed.

In planning the birth of our little guy at home, we came across a series of really unfortunate circumstances that was putting a lot of pressure on our financial situation. Because this is a home birth and my insurance doesn’t cover births outside of a hospital, there was a lot of money to be saved to afford it. This is was all something we knew and were prepared for upon conception but could not foresee that our entire life was going to change during these last ten months and that at 7 months pregnant our entire savings would be drained. We sat down many times and looked at each other, asking if we could even afford to give birth at home. Eventually, we were able to save up the biggest cost to pay our midwife but we had to sacrifice a lot of the comforts we wanted for our birth at home. One of the biggest sacrifices we made was deciding against a birth tub. I remember the tremendous relief water provided me in Juliette’s labor and I was nervous I would be able to get through the birth of our second without that relief (birth hurts, ok!). But we continued to talk about ways to afford a rental, considered just getting a $30 tub from Walmart (some relief is better than none, right?) or just preparing myself mentally not to use water at all (yeah…. I never got that far). On top of all of this I prayed and prayed that something would work out, that we would be able to have this birth the way we wanted and be happy.

The only thing I can use to describe this pregnancy so far is faith. We had to move out of our apartment, God provided a townhome a month later for cheaper rent (plus a backyard and a garage). We had absolutely no money in our bank account, John got a raise at work and our tax return was deposited that week which ended up being the perfect amount of money we needed to get by and reestablish our savings. Our tire popped! Discount Tire fixed it for free. We had no clothes for this guy, and we got a huge box of clothes from an extended family member and plenty more gifts from family. Every time I stressed, I decided to just send the stress of with a prayer and some how, some way the stress was taken care of.  And now this blessing that happened to us….

On Tuesday, as I was browsing Facebook while Juliette watched Clifford, I came across a posting from a woman who was apart of the same local group of moms that I was apart of. She needed to get rid of a birth tub, and was asking for the best offer. I immediately messaged the woman. I said something along the lines of, “I have no money but if you would consider donating your tub to my family I would be eternally grateful!” Her response? “COME GET IT!!!” (I’m not over exaggerating with the caps, she really did respond in caps!) I poured my thanks back over the message and she told me that she needed to get rid of the tub because she was moving to a shelter temporarily and could not bring it with her. She understood being in need and wanted to be able to bless anyone she could. She asked if we could give the tub back to a friend of hers who wanted to keep it for families like ours who wanted a tub but could not afford it. Happily, I obliged. I could not be more grateful for this blessing and want to continue that blessing forward. The night we went to pick it up she sent me a text saying it was in a box outside her garage because she unexpectedly had to run an errand and didn’t want to miss us. So literally we pulled up to a house we had never seen and took this box with a tub in it and the only thing I could do to really thank this woman was text her thank you in all caps.

Something about this gives me so much courage to give birth again. Why else would all these things be falling into place if I was not meant to be giving birth at home? Why would we be so taken care of? Why? We surely don’t deserve any of this. It’s not like we are these superbly moral people, who do good and give our money to the poor and have been much of a blessing to others? We literally have just focused all our attention and finances on taking care of our child and each other and somehow we were blessed. I can’t explain it. I cannot explain the grace and mercy on our life right now, because it doesn’t make sense. But God is taking care of us. And I just have to be thankful and grateful, and that’s all I feel I can give.

We just finished setting up the tub. Seeing it set up gives me so much excitement and peace. I cannot believe we were blessed with this. I really am in awe.

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Author: iloveyoumomma

Momma of 2. Food, Babies, Beauty. I just want us all to be at peace.

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