Juliette is 14 months as of April 5th, so in a little more than a week from now. Each day I wake up with her she’s more and more of a little girl, from how she responds to me with her fake laugh, or when she adamantly wants to touch my laptop or charging cords after I have told her “no” 27 times. She is exercising her will more and more and not responding well when we oppose her, as to be expected. But it just reminds me to respond with gentleness and patience because responding with harsh words and actions would only reinforce her aggressive behavior (she hits our hands when we tell her “no” or remove the remote or other enticing electronics from her hands). It’s a lot of practice what I preach as a parent to her right now. Sometimes it seems like it would be easier to smack her hand and tell her “don’t touch” but I just don’t believe that it is the right option for her. I don’t think it would foster the type of young woman I hope for her to be one day. She can be so rough sometimes but equally as loving. She’s becoming quite the momma’s girl, which I don’t mind, but part of me wonders if it’s the pregnancy hormones that make her constantly want to be in my space. We are trying to teach her hugs and kisses right now. She’s got hugs down but kisses are only when she feels like it (which is a rarity and makes her father and I leap the moon when she gives us one). She says “hi/hey” (we can’t quite tell) and “moo” and “wfff” which is her way of saying “woof!” As well as the typical “mama” “dada” and “baba” as well as a really cute “yayaya/lalala” (John and I debate on which one it actually is).
I want to expose her to more. Take her out more often and let her experience things but it’s hard to do myself, being she’s quite the busy body, and I know it will only get harder with another one coming. We have fallen into a routine and I’m obsessing about figuring out a way to change the back yard (which is all rocks) so we can play outside more.
I feel this deep need to connect with her as well, once again assuming that’s the pregnancy hormones. We attempted to start her sleeping in her own room – she was co-sleeping until 12 months, in her pack n’ play until recently and then moved her to her room. The first night she did great! Slept all the way through the night (unlike me) and then continually started waking up the next couple nights. After a tear filled talk with her father about how I was not ready for this step, we moved her back to the pack n’ play and now tonight she’s back in our bed. A small regression but we will work on it.
I miss my baby at times. This little girl I am meeting is so new, and I am beyond excited to know her, but my baby is dearly missed and though I do not wish to go back (because looking forward is the only positive thing to do) I will miss her. I’m so happy to see her growth and I long to see what person she turns into.
Xo, Rhea >